Wednesday, March 16, 2011
As my grandmother, Helen, used to say, "I feel drunk with power!" Helen never worried too much about not sleeping. When we thought she looked tired and would urge her to take a nap, she would say, "I'll have plenty of time to sleep when I am six feet under!"
Actually, I don't think that's true, because I'm sure she's enjoying hanging out with Mary, the mother of Jesus, and interfering with all of our lives by praying without ceasing. She had a bunch of colorful sayings, like "a blind man wouldn't know the difference" and "here he comes, sled and all" if you were coming in the door laden with packages or grocery bags. The Irish say things like that.
I think of her around St. Patrick's Day. I see her in my mind's eye, talking to her sister Kit at the end of the day. Not your typical old lady, she would sit on the red-carpeted bottom riser of the staircase and have a good chat, left elbow on her knee, leaning her head on her hand. The receiver of the rotary phone she never replaced was in her right. Then they both solved all the problems of the world in 10 minutes, two old ladies in slippers, one in East Hartford and the other in West.
Her house was my refuge with beatiful Victorian things that belong to me now. The silver service on the banner of this blog was hers. When I am very troubled, I go back to 23 Wind Road alone inside my mind and walk through those rooms. Every room is imprinted exactly as it was when I was a child. I know every creaky board on the floor. In real life, I will lie down on her bed with the pineapple carving.
Sometimes, I dream about 23 Wind Road. Suddenly, she will walk up the basement stairs with some laundry in a blue basket as if she had never been gone at all.
When my Dad first came here to visit, he looked around and said, "I love this house. I feel so at home here. You've created Wind Road all over again! It was the best compliment I could ever have.
The pic above is one painted of 23 Wind Road. My trees out front look just the same right now at the tree on the right. My bedroom was at the right second hand window. I still miss it.